Written by Brittany Clausen, MSW
Let’s face it—work can be stressful. From tight deadlines to challenging coworkers and clients, it’s not always easy to keep our emotions in check. Emotional triggers in the workplace are part of the human experience, but how we handle them can make a big difference in our relationships and overall well-being. In this blog post, we’ll talk about how emotional regulation, emotional intelligence, and understanding the dynamics of the workplace can help you stay confident and in control, even when emotions run high.
What Are Emotional Triggers, and Why Do They Matter?
We’ve all been there: someone says something that rubs us the wrong way, or a stressful situation pushes us past our limits, and suddenly, we’re feeling frustrated or upset. Emotional triggers are those moments when something—whether it’s a comment, a task, or even the tone of someone’s voice—sets off an emotional reaction. And while it’s totally natural to feel triggered, how we respond can make all the difference in our professional lives.
At work, emotional triggers can come from many different places: miscommunication, disagreements, or even stress from outside life. Understanding the emotional landscape in the workplace—what makes people tick, what they might be struggling with—can help us navigate these moments with more compassion and less frustration.
Emotional Regulation: Staying Calm When the Pressure’s On
Emotional regulation is a big term, but it’s really just about being able to manage your emotions in a way that’s appropriate for the situation. It’s about staying cool under pressure and not letting your emotions get the best of you, especially when things feel tense.
When you feel your emotions rising—maybe you’re getting defensive in a meeting or frustrated by a coworker’s comment—it’s important to pause and check in with yourself. Are you feeling stressed, angry, or anxious? By taking a moment to recognize what’s happening inside, you can choose a calm response rather than reacting impulsively.
Here are a few tips for keeping your emotions in check:
Deep Breathing: When your heart rate speeds up or your mind starts racing, take a few deep breaths to center yourself. It sounds simple, but it works.
Take a Step Back: If possible, step away from the situation for a minute. A quick break can help you reset and come back to the conversation with a clear head.
Change Your Perspective: Sometimes, looking at a situation from a different angle can help you see it in a new light. Instead of taking a colleague’s frustration personally, consider that they may just be stressed about something else.
Emotional Intelligence: Understanding Your Emotions and Others’
Emotional intelligence (EQ) is all about being aware of your emotions, understanding why you’re feeling the way you do, and knowing how to manage those feelings in a way that’s healthy and productive. It also means being able to understand and empathize with other people’s emotions. When you’re emotionally intelligent, you’re less likely to get pulled into someone else’s emotional turmoil.
Developing emotional intelligence can help you handle emotional triggers with ease. If a coworker reacts angrily to feedback, rather than getting defensive, you can recognize that their reaction may have more to do with their stress or insecurities than anything you said. This awareness helps you keep your own emotions in check and not take things personally.
You Don’t Have to Respond to Other People’s Emotional Triggers
One of the most powerful things about emotional intelligence is realizing that you don’t have to mirror other people’s emotions. If someone else is upset or emotional, you don’t have to react in the same way. Instead, you have the power to stay calm and composed, which can actually help defuse the situation.
Here’s how to handle it:
Pause Before Responding: Give yourself a moment before reacting. It’s tempting to respond right away, especially when someone’s upset, but taking a short pause allows you to stay grounded and think before you speak.
Choose Your Response: Remember that you’re in control of how you respond. You can listen, offer support, or even suggest a better way to handle the situation—without letting emotions get the best of you.
Set Emotional Boundaries: Just because someone is upset doesn’t mean you need to absorb their feelings. Setting emotional boundaries allows you to support others without taking on their emotional weight.
See Through Emotional Triggers Without Getting Caught Up in Them
Emotional triggers often come from something deeper—a personal stress, a past experience, or a current struggle that has nothing to do with you. When you recognize that, you can detach from the situation and avoid getting pulled into it.
For example, if a colleague snaps at you in a meeting, instead of feeling offended, remind yourself that their reaction might have more to do with stress they’re dealing with, not your actions. By seeing the bigger picture, you can avoid reacting emotionally and keep the situation from escalating.
Building Resilience for the Long Run
Managing emotional triggers in the workplace isn’t about being perfect—it’s about building the skills to handle those moments when emotions are running high. With practice, you can develop emotional regulation and emotional intelligence, and soon it will become second nature to stay calm, grounded, and confident, no matter what comes your way.
By practicing these strategies, you’ll not only become more resilient in your career, but you’ll also be fostering a healthier, more emotionally intelligent workplace where everyone can thrive.
Final Thoughts
Emotional triggers are a normal part of the workplace, but they don’t have to control us. By developing emotional intelligence and emotional regulation skills, we can manage our reactions with confidence and poise. You have the ability to stay calm and composed, even when others get triggered, and in doing so, you create a more supportive and productive work environment for yourself and your team.
References
Goleman, D. (2018). Emotional intelligence: Why it can matter more than IQ. Bantam Books.
Gross, J. J. (2017). Emotion regulation: Conceptual and empirical foundations. In J. J. Gross (Ed.), Handbook of emotion regulation (2nd ed., pp. 3-20). The Guilford Press.
Schutte, N. S., Malouff, J. M., & Hall, L. E. (2018). Emotional intelligence and well-being. In P.
S. Salovey & D. J. Sluyter (Eds.), Emotional development and emotional intelligence: Educational implications (pp. 215-232). Basic Books.
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